Lucky # 7

There are a few things I'm not particularly good at. Now, before you go thinking I am being coy or humble or anything else that is not okay to be these days for that matter, allow me to clue you in on the things in which I excel. (no, unfortunately, excel is not one of them. I wish I could figure out once and for all the stupid 'if' scenarios.)

For one thing, I posses an almost encyclopedic ability to remember minor, irrelevant details about certain dates, times, outfits in my life that in the grand scheme of things matter to no one. Why, I remember such details? I don't know. Does this help me win an argument time after time with certain people in my life, and no not because I am actually right in what I am defending or not defending, but because I stated facts about the date,or event,or time,or color shirt I was wearing, and however irrelevant the facts were, still managed to make my point sound more convincing? yes.

Apparently, I am also good at telling people what to do. Bossy? perhaps. Arrogant? you bet! But I am 100% sure the world would be a much happier place if people just listened and did exactly as I said. Now I am not saying I always take my own advice or trust my own instincts, but since its my blog, and you (yes you!) are my blog's reader... you must listen. or don't. in fact you could close this page up right now and never ever log on to my blog again. I don't care one way or the other. But I know you don't have the will power, you want to know what it is I have to say. hey, don't get mad at me.. but while I have your attention, here are the rules I think every human being should live by.. to make our world, or lets face it, my world a happier place..

1. If you are going to 'talk' about me, for the love of God, make it good. Not only good, make it great. Don't say something behind my back and then have the audacity to smile to my face (only I am allowed such hypocrisy).

2. If you can't get a babysitter- STAY HOME. You wanted kids, so suck it up & subscribe to Netflix and stop ruining my movies.

3. If you are going to leave me a voicemail. Do just that. Don't leave me a voicemail (which I barely if ever check by the way) and then text me and call me and text me again. pick one. text or voicemail. NOT BOTH.

4. ENOUGH with celebrity gossip. I don't understand why the problems of jon & kate, britney spears, kanye west and the like, are competing with our headlines, in cnn as well as in our brains. we have to be smarter than that. and if we are not. lets pretend.

5. FACEBOOK is not the world. We have become so engulfed with our online persona and who de-friended us, and who forgot to tag us and who broke up with us...here's a better question. WHO CARES. seriously, its not that serious.

6. Because you read my blog, does not automatically mean we are "friends". In fact very few people on this earth I actually call friends-wait I take that back-I have many friends...but only trust about one or two. So please, don't email me and say "I don't know you but we should get to know eachother because we think alike". NO WE DON'T. trust me. You don't think like me. Just read the blog or like I stated earlier, don't read it, but please, if I don't know who you are, chances are I am not going to reply to your messages. Unless you are hiring. Thanks.

7. I don't have anything else to say, but you know I would never end anything with an even number. Plus I love the number 7, not because it signifies big winnings on a slot machine or because it is a number associated in the spiritual world, but because my father was born on the 7th. So in my eyes that is luck enough.